Hitler

I was looking through piles of brand new second hand books when the name Albert Speer and the book “Infiltration” caught my eye. I was wracking my brain trying to remember where I heard that name. So, I opened the book and read the synopsis and then I remembered reading Speer’s earlier book “Inside the Third Reich.” It was a few years ago when I bought a dilapidated paperback edition of that book. I was looking for it in my shelfr so that I could review it, but I can’t find it. (I had this habit of buying old books and then after reading them, I just forget about them. So whenever the titles books I had read were quoted in other books, I have this urge to look for the book and re-read them. Of course, most of the time, I can’t find them.)

Here’s an interesting description of Hitler:

Hitler so thoroughly embodied his politics, and all his helpers had so utterly lost their own will power, that Hitler’s person, rather than political considerations, counted for everything. In regard to anti-Semitism, Hitler could have safely taken a radical about face without his follower’s rebelling. For, example, there was unprotesting acceptance of his pact with the Soviet Union, which directly contradicted his doctrines of many years. Such denial of all the principles with which he had waged his struggle for power was accepted unthinkingly. His will alone determined destiny.

Infiltration is a book about Himmler and his plan to build an SS industrial empire.

(Actually this is the subtitle of the book. My gulay, I need to learn how to write book reviews!)

Treasure Hunting

I was on my brother’s bike passing a vacant lot when I saw these people rummaging through sludge looking for treasures. (These trucks vacuum sludge from drain canals.) Usually it’s the children that do this. Every afternoon, on my way to my afternoon walks. I can see children, some still in their school uniforms, feeling through the sludge looking for coins. What is surprising is that these children are not really that poor because they wear decent clothes and they look healthy enough for me to say that they were not that desperate in life. I heard some of them do this so that they can have money to play computer games.

One afternoon I saw this man checking out a ring found by a boy. The man was trying to haggle with the boy; he was offering five hundred pesos for the ring. I could hear them because the man was loud; he was almost pleading. Five hundred pesos, that’s a lot of money for a child. The ring must be worth a lot of money. I was just passing so I don’t know what happened to the ring. I hope it’s not Frodo’s ring because I hate to see Orcs attacking our humble town.

Anyway, news must have gotten around of treasures in the sludge. Trucks that arrive in this vacant lot are now awaited by children and adults alike. Some are so “greedy” that they can’t even wait for the trucks to complete the dumping--these are dump trucks and some of them tilt and fall and could crush them. But what are these risks if they can find treasures in an hour or so of hunting.

Boxing and Prayer

I saw Manny “The Pacman” Pacquaio, the Filipino boxing champion, being interviewed on TV. He said he was practicing very hard and praying very hard in preparation for his fight against a Mexican boxer.

There are campaigns to pray for Manny's fight…The other side must be doing that too; the Mexicans must praying hard for their champion too.

During his fights, Manny’s mother invites priest to conduct masses for Manny. There were prayer vigils and even some TV people and sports commentators asks the Filipino to pray for Manny “the Pacman” as he tries to knock out and maim his opponent in the ring in the name of nationalism and patriotism and dollars.

This is my attack: How can a country that values life, that oppose legislation against family planning and so on… and the church that prided itself as the moral force in the country leading the fight against family planning, human rights abuse, tortures, kidnapping and gambling conduct masses for a murderous sport like boxing!

Or is it because the pay for these masses is good?

For the life of me I will not be able to understand this.

If there’s one thing that the church should hold masses for is that brutality like these should be stopped in the name of God.

Let’s pray that Manny Pacquaio know that God is love.

I don’t care if Manny wins or loose, but let’s leave God out of this…what you call this…barbaric sport.

(My gulay, I’m in a bad mood today.)

As The Deer, Jim Greeninger

This is good! Maybe its time I do something like this.

Speed Trip

I was bored. And, to cure my boredom, what I did was to ride my brother’s bike to the unfinished high way in Taytay, Rizal. (The highway is called “High Way 2000” and its now 2007 and the high way is still not finished. The projected accomplishment date of the project was the year 2000, that’s why they call it “High Way 2000.” But it’s almost 2008; I think they better change the name of the highway from “High Way 2000” to “High Way 2000 years to Build.” It tells so much of the efficiency of the inefficiency of the government’s infrastructure building…hmmm….whatever.)

Anyway, (the parenthesis made me lose what I’m thinking about) I rode the bike and had fun. I full throttled the 125 cc bike and watched as the speedometer climbed to over 100 Kmh. (It may not be fast enough for some, but in the Philippines where the average speed of vehicles in city traffic is 5 meters per hour, 100 Kmh is supersonic.) I had this sense of freedom, like I’m flying.

I could feel the bike’s motor vibrating as it reached its maximum revolution, but I quickly reduced speed because I can already feel that the front wheels were wiggling. This is the problem with small bikes; other riders say that to avoid the front wheels from wiggling, the rider can lean on the front wheel to put some weight and stability in there. I tried it, but it felt awkward. A short burst of speed is enough for me, I am not planning to break any speed record; I’m just having fun.

Riding bikes reminds me of my late father and my uncle and the senior resident pastor of our church going to the eastern towns of Rizal Province preaching the gospel. Me and my siblings backriding and…it’s an early training in evangelism…that I missed (actually what I missed are the meriendas!).

Questions

We were discussing sin when a member of the class asked me, “Why is it that God made life this way? Why can’t he just make things easier for us?” The other asked why is it that it was eve who sinned and not Adam? Why was it that it was Eve who was tempted and not Adam? Would it be different if it was Adam who was tempted first?”

Another theorized the necessity of balancing good with evil…and so on and so on. These questions are inevitable in a Bible class and I have seen a lot of pastors, even those from the TV, attempting to answer these questions with Bible verses and sometimes with logic and sometimes with just pure speculation and, really, what usually happens is that as answers are formulated more questions arises until, without noticing it, more question arises ad infitum.

I asked questions like these and I knew the answer. Most people who ask these questions, I think, knew the answers too but they just can’t help asking them. So, I smiled and told the class that, the answer to these questions is that there’s no answer to these questions because these questions are beyond us.

If we believe the Bible, the answers can be quite simple. But people can’t help being curious.

Philosophy can explore these questions and if one reads them, and get pass through the first few pages, one forget these questions and suddenly realized that “head aches” is a good way of diverting these questions. But unfortunately there’s no answer in there in a way, well, most Filipino’s think of an answer, which are concrete answers.

I have a good way of dealing with these questions and it always worked: I read sci-fi novels.

Mea Culpa

I accidentally entered a one way zone. I was stopped by a policeman, who looked more like a policeboy, and asked me for my driver’s license. I gave it with a smile because my driver’s license had expired and I have not renewed it. He looked at it, brought me to the station, and removed the license plate of the motorbike. I tried pleading but it didn’t work.

In the police station all the young policemen were looking at me, some were whispering, “Hey, he looks like the chief.” “Hey, isn’t that the chief?” They were looking at my driver’s license and they kept asking me if I’m related to this or that person and most of the time I didn’t even know the names they were mentioning. I have the impression that because I wear glasses and looked like a “learned man", I think they thought that I am a man with connections. So they were a little kinder to me. They called me “kuya” or big brother and the guy who gave me the ticket even told me this, “Brother, I am just writing you the ticket. I am not the one who apprehended you; tell that to whomever you will be calling.”

Yes, I’m bad. I was caught driving without a license. Anyways, I am not proud of this: After a few days my driver’s license and the bike’s license plate were brought to our house by my friend, a policeman. I didn’t pay a single centavo, though I offered to pay the fines.

I’m bad!

My wife told her lady friend of what happened to me. A few days later my wife’s friend had a police story of her own. Her little brother was apprehended for the same reason that I was, he entered a one way lane. His driver’s license was confiscated and he was issued a ticket. My wife’s friend, the older sister, went to the police station to settle the matter. It just so happens that my wife’s friend is attractive. So when the policemen saw her, they gave her back the driver’s license without any ado. They were even joking about how one of their colleagues could apprehend such a “beautiful lady.”

Of course my wife’s friend was not flattered. She told my wife that she almost thought of calling Mike Enriquez, the “imbestigador,” to have the policemen’s “unfairness” and “lustiness’ exposed to the media when she saw a homely lady begging the policemen for her driver’s license and the way they treated her shabbily.

I’m bad but… the whole system is worse.

I know, I'm working on getting a new license but it's that hassle that's driving me nuts.

Beep!

Our church’s senior pastor, my uncle, was about to do the benediction when the church was disturbed by the ascending beep of a cellphone, it’s an ancient NOKIA. First, the congregation was searching who was the culprit. But as the beeping grew louder, we found out that it was the pastor’s cellphone. The whole church was laughing.

The scene was funny and to tell the truth a little humorous disturbance like this can sometimes break the monotony of the church. But…hmmm...it becomes annoying.

It reminds of the scene I saw on House MD, a primetime TV program. Dr. House was sitting on a chair and watching his pocket TV, moving it from time to time for a better reception when a nun approached him and told him that he is in a house of prayer. Dr. House looked at the nun, sarcastically smiled and said, “No wonder the reception was strong.”

Hmmmm…and….hmmmm…. “No wonder the reception was strong.”

Table Turned

I was reviewing my blog and I noticed that there’s no post about theology for almost a month now. I haven’t done much “theologizing.” Maybe it’s because that as a Sunday school teacher now, especially for the men of our church, the table, somehow, has been turned. Instead of being the “asker”, I am now forced to become the “answerer” of other people’s questions about God and things that are concerned with God. And, as the Sunday school classes progress, I realized my inadequacies when it comes to Bible doctrines. I have spent most of my “theologizing” by reading theologians and very little of the Bible.

I am not saying that this is bad because I have learned a lot from these theologians; although, most of the times, I don’t even know what they were talking about. But, this has resulted in my faith becoming a…hmmm…mental…pursuit. I am by nature an inquisitive person. The problems I encountered with faith are more of the rational basis for having it. Looking back, I don’t know if I thought that way because I used to live a sinful life, or I lived a sinful life because I used to think that way. Really, it’s a spiritual emptiness subconsciously disguised as an intellectual...hmmm…what’s the word…hmm…wandering?

Anyway, it does not matter now because I’m back in the church.

I am humbled at the same time troubled and most of the times stumped because most of the questions asked in Sunday school were questions I never even took the time to consider and even think about seriously. Questions I took for granted because I was not that interested in them in the first place.

Examples are: Is man composed of three parts namely body, spirit, and soul? Or is man composed of two parts, body and spirit and/or soul? What is the difference between a follower and a disciple? Do angels have freewill? And etc. All I can say is what the Bible and what the books and commentaries say, but on the personal level, I found out that I don’t even have a stand on these doctrines! So what if humanity is composed of three or two parts? Who cares? Here are the views; you choose which one is acceptable to you.

That has been my attitude about doctrines and I am really surprised to find out that it is impossible to teach the Bible without the teacher, in this case me, having any stand and convictions on what is being taught!

I thought that teaching Bible doctrines would be as simple as teaching other doctrines like communism, or idealism, or materialism and other-isms, but it is not. It is teaching about faith--objectivity does not apply!

As I am teaching Biblical doctrines, I am also relearning them.

On aging and ageism

Fundamentally, the term “aging” is derived from the organic realm. Aging is also a social process, and as such it is accorded different cultural values in different settings. The terms “youth” and “age” belong to the rhetoric of this continuum of the biological life span, which is given different meanings in different societies. But we also apply these terms to artifacts. And when we do, the negative connotations attached to the term “age” when it is used to describe, for example, a material object that is falling apart (such as car or a washing machine), will return to the human domain laden with negative associations.

We also, of course, use the term “new” and “old” to describe both artifacts and organic beings--it’s a new tree, we say, or a “new” car. But we do not say that a computer or a blender are “young.” The problem, then, is that the term “old” but not the term “young” is transferable from the organic realm to the technological realm—and then back again. And generally speaking, in our technological culture there is nothing good about an artifact or a technology that is old. The supreme value is to work efficiently (which is understood to be synonymous with being new), not to breakdown. In short, I would argue that rhetoric (as well as social practices) of the technological culture of advanced capitalism contributes to widespread ageism against older generations.

Age relations are power relations—with the young generally holding the power over the old.
Kathleen Woodward
From Virtual Cyborgs to Biological Time Bombs:
Technocriticism and the Material Body

Erap's Verdict

Former Philippine President Joseph Ejecito "Erap" Estrada

I was rudely waken by our neghbor's TV airing the covering (coverage is what I mean) of Erap's, our country's former president that has been ousted by that thing called people's power, judgment. Erap was convicted of plunder, which is a capital offense, and was sentenced with reclusion perpetua (why can't they just say "forty years"), pending motions for reconsiderations and appeal to the Philippine Supreme Court.

Jinggoy, Erap's son, and Atty. Serapio was acqutitted of all charges.

Other alleged Erap accomplices was issued warrants of arrest for their non appearance in the trials. One lawyer said they missed the chance of being acquitted like Jinggoy.

This is funny: Erap was convicted of plunder and all the money and properties he has stolen was confiscated by the government yet he was acquitted of perjury cases. I mean, how can that happen?

Copyreading and Campus Journalism

One more month and the semester will be over. Just like an average lazy Filipino thirty five year old teen ager, who like to do things at the last minute, I will spend most of the last weeks doing copyreading, lay outing and writing articles for this semester’s issue of our student paper.

I used to love doing student publication work. I joined the student paper because as a language major, I believed this is the best place to hone my poor English. (Truth is I love reading and writing but I hate grammar and all its rules.) I was first a contributor, and then I became the paper’s copyreader and later on it’s chief. I am a bit of a trivia because as a sophomore I was the youngest chief, but at the age of 33, I was, at the same time then, the oldest student publication chief (I can’t remember how many times I was mistaken for the faculty adviser or a professor or the campus director) in the history of the campus and maybe even in the history of the whole university, and maybe even in the history of campus journalism in the whole archipelago! Beat that!

I apologize; I sometimes have these delusions of grandeur.

But issues after issues, the work became…hmmm… boring. Maybe it’s because as I grow older, as I become more ancient by the day, my attention span grows shorter. Maybe, just maybe, it’s because I’m already into my very early second childhood.

I must get back to work and copyread articles. Strange thing is…I hate doing this, copyreading, to my own writings because most of the times I have this urge to push the delete button and erase all the nonsense things I write about.

(One thing I noticed is that most of the literary articles I am copyreading talked about love. I am a bit jealous because most of my poems and articles talked about nothing. I mean compared to love, everything else is mundane. No, I’m not being sarcastic because it is true, as it was for me during my youth, that love is everything to teenagers who are just beginning to discover the power of their super hormones. But for old timers like me…”love was a many splendor things.” )

Copyreading love poems do this to me. Crazy, crazy…bwa,ha,ha,ha (ala Vincent Price’s laughter in “Thriller”). Bwa, ha, ha, ha…Boy, I’m sick.

Failure of Examinations

It happened a few weeks ago. Our English instructor, who is a nice lady (I'm sucking up here) and is also the campus institute of education head, was fuming mad about a call she received that morning. She was murmuring like a constipated killer bee. So, being the grand “kuya” of the class, she told me what’s bothering her. She said me that she received a call that morning about some students from the campus applying for a part time job. I don’t know if it was one of those clerical part time jobs, but the company where these students were applying for called the campus to enquire how these students got good grades when they can’t even write a decent sentence in English. She’s pissed off when she received the call; she’s a veteran teacher of English so when she told me that she handled the call well, I believed her.

I’m not good with grammar, but I’m trying my best. That’s why I have this blog, sort of a laboratory and a gym. Anyways, I do average in my English class. (Yes, I’m trying to create an exit door in case my instructors who read this blog ask me who am I to say such things when I can’t even write a decent composition and when I can’t even pass their quizzes …)

Our instructor bombed the class that morning. How dare….? How dare…? And how dare?! And then she ranted about the instructors’ grading system. I heard she called a faculty meeting) Not satisfied with that, she ordered the class to do sentence writing exercises using the formula S-V-O, S-TV-DO, S-TV-D-O-O blah, blah, and all those things that I never took the time to study and memorize. I mean, I hate math and all those formulas, so, why do I have to torture myself with it in my English class. Anyways, I think she suspected that the applicants came from our class; I suspected that too. It’s like she’s punishing them, or us.

Students’ English proficiency problem starts from the bottom of the educational chain and there’s very little a college teacher can do to correct this. But our instructor is right about the grading system. There are classmates of mine who I think don’t deserve even to pass the course yet they received grades worthy of magna cum laudes. Yes they deserve the grades because they did well on their examinations and recitations. But on the other hand, they don’t deserve the grades because the type of the examinations that were given was mostly the objective type—very little comprehension, critical thinking and expression involved. I mean, anyone who can memorize all those things the instructors wrote on the board can pass the exams with flying colors. Language, English for that matter, is more than that—it’s communication and has very little to do with “regurgitating” terms and definitions.

I told our instructor this in a more diplomatic way, and, I think, she agrees with my obvious observations.

I don’t know I write about these things when even I, most of the times, don’t even know if my grammar is correct! Ironic.

Backlog

I'll be back nextweek, I think. I'm taking a little break from blogging.