Hearse, dreams and blah, blah, blah...

This is how it's supposed to be!

I was motorcycling along downtown Taytay one afternoon when I saw a slow moving Toyota Innova being followed by a group of people some wearing black dresses and most of them were under their umbrellas, many were in tears. Of course, I instantly knew that this was a funeral procession, but I found it weird and hmmm… inappropriate and, to use stronger words, cheap and disrespectful of the dead to use a minivan to transport their remains to the cemetery.

Call me traditionalist but I am used to seeing big, wide bodied, majestic and powerful black station wagons carrying the departed’s remains. The design and the bodyworks of these vehicles radiate grief, solemnity and the macabre and that’s what makes these vehicles special-they symbolize the dignity and the mystery of death. The mere sight of one of these vehicles instantly invokes in the mind a sense of grief whether they are just passing by or on their way to the cemetery.

When I was a boy I had this weird dream. The back of our house was a rice field (now, its a squatter colony) with ipil-ipil and banana trees and the soft fresh air that blew especially during the afternoons never fail to lull me to sleep. The backdoor was open to let the air in and I was lying on a cot when I saw a big black hearse passing by. I was puzzled because there was no road, not even a dirt road there, just rice field with dikes or pilapil. What scared me most was how the hearse traveled as if it was floating on air, so relaxed, so serene.

Of course, afternoons dreams are vivid especially when one falls asleep without noticing it and the line dividing reality from dream was crossed so smoothly that it becomes difficult to tell. Anyway, I rose from the cot making up my mind if what I saw was real or if it was just a dream.

Anyway...

There is culture surrounding these vehicles and with the slow disappearance (or phase out) of these vehicles, I fear the superstitions and the stories inspired by them would also disappear.

I mean I had experiences of cock-fighters (sabungeros) backing out and going home upon seeing these vehicles. They look upon these big black vehicles as an omen of bad luck. How would these gamblers react when they see a Toyota Innova or Mitsubishi Adventure hearse? I mean these vehicles….I cannot imagine…these vehicles are not ominous; they are harmless and they evoke family, outings, fun, even when these vehicles are painted black.  

Hmmmm....times are really changing.

Neglected

Hmmmm…it’s the beginning that’s difficult.

I am thinking about my blog and not having posted anything for weeks makes me feel guilty about it. Somehow, like my fish in my tanks and my bonsais and other plants, I have developed this feeling that my blog is somehow a living thing that requires attention and care.

Hmmm…maybe a symptom of OCD or something,

Anyway, I was thinking…”I haven’t written another stupid thing on my blog and what could be the reason?”

Maybe, I gotten so used to teaching in Filipino that I have forgotten how to use English (bad as my English is, I try to keep in practice by writing inane stuffs on my blog).

Or, this is what I fear, after being swallowed by the “system”-nilamon na ng sistema-I have become a zombie, one of those forlorn, weary, tired, haggard semi-dead human being that goes to school in the morning carrying classroom materials—a zombie bent on doing one thing alone: to drone in the class.  

PBB

I heard from the news that the government is now doing away with the uniform Christmas bonus that amounts to ten thousand pesos which, as have become the practice, was named after presidents like during GMA’s time it was called Glorification something and during President Noynoy’s time was called Pnoy.

Anyway, instead of the uniform bonus, the government will now be implementing the PBB or the performance based bonus. This means that the bonus each government employee could receive will range from the minimum 5,000 pesos to the ceiling 35, 000 pesos. Hmmm…I am thinking that this is an administrative nightmare for the personnel involved in the processing of the PBB. Of course, the positive side is that the incentive would encourage civil servants to perform better but the thing is, I bet that this system could be used by bosses to favor their pets, which is not unthinkable and actually happens.

As a government employee, I am adapting a wait and see attitude.